Sunday, May 9, 2010

At Least One

I think every woman needs to have at least one best girlfriend. Someone that she doesn't have to hesitate to call, one that understands her, one that just "gets" it.  I'm am very blessed that I have a couple of these best girlfriends in my life whether they're friends or family.

My mom will tell you that I'm not the easiest person to live with. By my own accord I am stubborn, willful, disorganized, and discombobulated. But I think that I am also loyal, loving, caring, and can be a great laugh.  I am very lucky to have friends who love me in spite of me :)  I'm sure there has been a time or two that my best girlfriends have wanted to throw me out the window, but I know that they would also have been there with the big inflatable mattress at the bottom to catch me.

My friends don't live nearby. Yes, I have friends locally. Yes, I have friends that I hang out with to have lunch or dinner. But my best girlfriends live at least at an hour away and one who lives about a 12-hour drive away. I'm also lucky to call my sisters-in-law my friends. Having no sisters of my own, marrying into a family with 4 ready made sisters was...well...intimidating! But also so very nice to know that I had someone to turn to for questions on child-rearing or family relationships or just about anything.

But I truly think that women really need to have that best girlfriend(s).  It's funny, I have two that I probably talk to or seen on a regular basis, but they don't live anywhere close. One lives in another state, but she and I probably talk on the phone at least once to twice a week. The other I probably never talk to on the phone, but I see at least once a month but I feel I'm never at a loss to know what she is doing because she blogs. Thank goodness for blogs! It also helps that our kids are best friends.

About two days ago I was at my wit's end. Hubby was working late again this week. While he was supposed to be home earlier because it was Friday, with a change in his computer at work and a document that needed to be reviewed, and getting ready for a week-long business trip that he has to leave for on Mother's Day, things got a little hairy at home. The kids were missing him and I was missing him.  He came home late, but just in time to hear the crying/screaming fest from our kids who were beyond tired but couldn't pull it together for bedtime.

As he relieved me and took over bedtime, I sat down to FB a message to one of my nearest and dearest girlfriends. Her life is as busy as mine. Here husband runs his own law practice and is running for public office. He often misses dinner and works hard. Her schedule is as busy as mine and while we rarely speak on the phone (because who has the time to have a real conversation while the kids are awake and while we're trying to play catchup with the household chores while they're asleep!) we're the best of friends. I know that if I needed her she would come running and vice-versa. So I sent her this Facebook message asking her for sanity savers while the hubby is MIA.  Remember I was totally done by this point and could not think clearly.  I think my title was, "How do you do it?"  She sent me a message back with several good ideas that are easily implementable. But it was her last sentence that sent me over:  "Can I come over Monday AND Wednesday?"  She was already coming over on Wednesday to play with my kids and to give me a break so that I could do some things in preparation for the week after Hubby got back from his business trip.  But in her e-mail she also offered to come another day. She was offering to give me the most precious thing she could give, Her TIME.  I felt so completely blessed, loved, and humbled all at once.  I absolutely hate asking for help from anyone, because I never want to impose on anyone. But she could hear my desperation through my FB message and she came running.

Just knowing that she was there for me is enough to remind me to inhale and exhale slowly and to know that while my Hubby is away I wasn't alone.  To have that kind of friendship is priceless and I am so grateful.

Take some time while you can this week and give your best friend a call.  Whether you chat on the phone, skype, or email, try to spend some time to catch up, vent, and laugh about something.  Enjoy!

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