Saturday, September 18, 2010

Hey, Where's the Manual?

After a couple of weeks of diagnosing poison ivy and all of its crazy symptoms I feel like I should have gone to medical school. My little boy spent a week breaking out without any complaint and then BAM he was scratching, crying, and miserable :(  Fortunately he is doing much better with a combination of cortisone cream, antihistamine, and prednisone. Unfortunately, it got so bad that he needed the prednisone, and now he's a hot mess emotionally, but we're going with the flow and trying to make things easier for him.

After being a parent for 4 1/2 years I feel like I should have gotten a degree not only in education, but in psychology, and in med school.  I feel like no one is completely ready for child-rearing. I mean, many of us think we are, and many of us want children, therefore we have our families...but did we really know what we were getting into?  I knew about the late nights, had an inkling to the anxiety, the benefits of routine and consistency, but no, I wasn't ready for this.

I wasn't ready for the complete fear that grips me when my children are sick and there is nothing that I can do except follow doctor's orders and whatever prescribed meds (if any).  The sadness that fills me when they are hurt, sad, or upset.  The incredible joy I feel when I hear, "I wa ewe, Mama," "You're the best, Mommy," "I love you, Mama," or when I see my children accomplish something new, like lines in the preschool Christmas play, scoring a goal in soccer, or learning a new dance step.

But there are days that I'm glad I have a degree in education and can help my kids learn how to read, count, and have a love for learning.  There are other days that I wish I had pursued a degree in child psychology (like I had originally planned), and definitely medical school.   I wonder if any of that would alleviate some of the anxiety that goes along with parenthood.

Parenting has been a roller coaster ride and a learning curve. Despite the weariness, the anxiety, the fear, it has been the best job I have ever had. I have to say that the joys definitely outweigh the bad stuff :) Just wish I had a manual...

1 comment:

  1. if you find one can I get a copy? I agree there are days when I think what did I get myself into? And then I think I a the luckiest woman in the world! It is definitely a ride!

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