Friday, April 9, 2010

The Curse of Having a Helpful Husband

It must be Spring or the beginning of warmer weather. I know this, not because the birds are chirping, the flowers are blooming, and we are playing outside, but because my husband has to work late and is going on travel (soon) for work.

It stinks...sucksola!  I hate it.  I get stressed and anxious about  his travels weeks before he actually leaves. It makes me edgy and moody. Mostly I worry about him flying.  I hate when he flies by himself. I would rather be flying with him. Not because I like flying because (here's a morbid thought), he goes, I go.  That's right, if something were to happen, we would be together.  There you go, welcome to my neurosis.

While my husband usually works 40-50 hours a week (including commuting time it can be up to 60-70 hours a week), he is truly helpful around the house.  As soon as he walks in the door he's in Dad/Husband mode. No rest for the weary. He plays with the kids while I finish putting dinner on the table. He's getting them ready for bed while I clean up after dinner. I think I mentally, emotionally, and physically relax because he's home.  I don't have to be "on" for the kids. I can take a break.

We work so well together. It's nice having a partner helping you with everything. Someone you don't have to explain what goes where or how the children do x, y, and z.  We're a team and we work in tandem.  When he's gone, I'm solo. Not only do I do my "jobs" around the house, I do his, too.  It's the daily chores, I'm talking about...getting the kids ready for bed, loading and unloading the dishwasher, taking out the trash, making sure the house is secure for the night, feeding the cats and scooping the litter.  It's those things that make my day easier. They're daily chores that get done and I don't have to think about them.

To add to that I think my mommy radar works in overtime. I don't sleep as well because I'm subconsciously listening for my children and any possible invaders. I know,  I know, invaders? Highly unlikely, but in my neurotic world anything can happen.  Who knows, maybe I should sleep with a bat time and say "It's go time" if I hear somebody in my house (bonus points to anyone who can identify that scene from a current television show).

Having him gone for several days is really the curse of having a helpful husband. I realize just how much he really does for the family.  On top of all of his helpfulness, he is my best friend. The one person who knows me completely, inside and out. At the end of the day he knows just what to say to make me feel like I'm a good mother and wife.  Missing his companionship just makes him going away that much harder.

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